


more fun than a barrel of monkeys

by Medie



Series: Nora-verse [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-02-22
Updated: 2010-02-22
Packaged: 2017-10-07 11:41:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/64823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Medie/pseuds/Medie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"What?" Nora finds the matches. "You never watch Underworld?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	more fun than a barrel of monkeys

**Author's Note:**

> written for the [](http://community.livejournal.com/spn_roadhouse/profile)[**spn_roadhouse**](http://community.livejournal.com/spn_roadhouse/)'s [prompt-a-thon](http://community.livejournal.com/spn_roadhouse/17985.html). Thanks [](http://havocthecat.livejournal.com/profile)[**havocthecat**](http://havocthecat.livejournal.com/) for the incessent poking, yes, this is the same Nora as from [Where's Campbell When You Need Him?](http://medie.livejournal.com/1300884.html#cutid1) and would you believe it took three tries for the _cut tag_ to take? Dear LJ, *smack*

*

She knows there were two of them. Tightening her grip on the machete, Jo turns in a slow circle and searches the shadows for the other one. His girlfriend lies spread-eagle at her feet, her head a few feet away by the door.

She got the drop on one; she's not going to get it twice.

Her palms are sweaty and she rubs one against her jeans, just catching the blur of movement out of the corner of her eye.

She yells, dropping the machete with a clatter when hands seize her arms and she's knocked to the floor. The vampire snarls into her face, teeth descending for the attack, and her nose wrinkles. Blood-drinking is not conducive to minty-fresh breath.

"Ever hear of tic-tacs?" She manages, bringing her knee up. _Hard_.

He retaliates by yanking her head to one side, baring her neck.

Jo closes her eyes and that's when she hears the shots.

*

"Look at it this way, kiddo," Jo's rescuer cracks her gum and grins, "I could be a Winchester."

She closes her eyes. She'd take the vampire first.

Pushing the dead vampire (isn't that an oxymoron?) aside, she looks up at the gum-chewing woman who offers a hand.

Jo lets her pull her up, asking, "You know Sam and Dean?" She tenses, cautious. People who know Winchesters? They generally want to shoot them.

She would know.

The answer comes with a wry smirk. "Oh yeah, spent a very long, memorable night with one."

Jo's got a pretty good idea which and smirks back. "You and half the women in the country."

"Oh yeah," the brunette says around a laugh. "You, I think I'll keep." She tucks away her gun. "Name's Nora Scott and you've got to be Ellen's runaway." Jo scowls and Nora's grin widens. "Relax kid; I'm not going to call Mommy, that's your job."

"I'm not calling her," Jo insists mutinously. "I..." Biting off her reply, which sounds defensive even to her, she shrugs. "I keep in touch."

God, that sounds even worse.

"Sure you do," Nora agrees too readily. Patting down her jacket, she glances over. "Don't suppose you smoke?"

Jo wrinkles her nose.

"Damn, I forgot my matches and no way I'm leaving Vlad here for the cops to find. A couple rounds is enough to kill him but...not going to completely take care of the leftovers."

Jo follows her gaze to the corpse and blinks at the change. The flesh is pockmarked, eating itself away before her eyes. "How..."

Nora grins. "Ultraviolet fluid inside, it's sunlight in a bullet."

"That works?" Jo asks then grimaces. Dead vampire at her feet. _Duh_.

"What?" Nora finds the matches. "You never watch Underworld?"

*

Nora's got a room in the same motel as Jo's, right next door.

She got the one with the good bathroom (nothing's crawling in the tub) which Jo discovers when Nora shoves her inside with an armful of fresh clothes.

Still suspicious, she listens at the door for ten minutes to see if Nora's calling her mother. When she's satisfied Nora isn't, she turns on the water and looks around the room. She doesn't remember Nora from the roadhouse, she's pretty sure she would if she'd met her.

Jo nods and pats the knife she keeps on her. She doesn't have to trust her, she's just using her shower.

*

"I thought sunlight didn't seriously hurt vampires?" Jo asks from where she's curled up on one of the beds, chipped coffee mug in hand. "Like it gave them hives or something."

"It depends," Nora produces a hairbrush from her bag and tosses it Jo's way. "Peanuts are harmless for most people but..." She grins. "Just about all of them'll die if you plug two of the ultraviolet rounds straight through the heart. It's a thing."

Jo nods. "Right."

Nora sits on the other bed with a bag of M&amp;M's in hand. "So, this is where I give you the stereotypical 'you're kind of young to be doing this' speech." She holds out the bag. "Following Dad's footsteps?"

"Yeah." Jo takes a handful. "You?"

"Mom. Dad hunts but," Nora grins, "he's not exactly Van Helsing you know?"

Jo laughs and nearly burns her tongue on the coffee. "Shit," she complains, wiping her chin. "I am such a klutz."

"As long as your aim's only lousy when it comes to your mouth," Nora shrugs, "I'm not worried."

Jo almost tests her promise, nearly spilling the rest of her coffee when her eyes widen and she sits up sharply. "You mean…"

"Well, I did say I'd keep you, didn't I?" Nora reminds. "You're not here just for your pretty face. You screw this up, and I'll drag your ass back to that roadhouse." She holds up a hand. "But this is not a permanent thing. Somebody needs to show you the ropes. Better me than Dean." She shudders dramatically. "You'd just end up zombie bait for cheerleaders."

Jo squints. "What?"

"Believe me, you don't want to know."

"Yeah, I do."

Nora chuckles. "I'll tell you when you're older."

Jo huffs a breath and looks annoyed. "Are you sure that Mom didn't send you?"

She's not expecting the laugh that comes out of Nora. "Fuck, no. Ellen wouldn't trust me with her precious baby girl if I was the last hunter breathing." Nora leers wickedly. "I'm a bad influence."

Jo swallows nervously, her mind spinning with a dozen different ways she could take that. "Did you really get the idea for the ammo from a movie?"

Nora shakes her head. "Ash. He's got a thing for what's-her-name is that played the lead. I'm just the only one he could convince to try it." She grins and settles back on the other bed. "I'll try anything once."

*

Jo wakes up at dawn the smell of the coffee being waved in front of her. "Up and at 'em, kiddo. Practice time."

It takes a moment for her brain to kick into gear and she mumbles, "I know how to shoot." Swallowing a mouthful of coffee, she makes a face, "This is crap."

"Sorry, the guys next door? Not exactly Starbucks." Nora smirks and Jo wishes for her knife. No one should be this fucking perky this early. "Your Mom likes to brag, but personally? I want to see you in action. Now, get moving before I break out the ice water."

"Bitch," Jo accuses around a yawn.

"Flirt," Nora laughs.

*

Watching Nora stack up old Pepsi bottles on a fence, Jo swallows hard. It feels like she's a kid again, waiting to watch her Dad practice. She hugs herself and looks away, blinking back unexpected tears.

Her eyes fall on the open trunk of Nora's car and she wanders over to look.

"Remind me to count guns later," says Nora dryly from behind her.

"Knives," Jo counters. "I like them better."

"Up close and personal huh?" That earns a slow, wicked grin. "I can buy that." Nora selects a gun, a slim Beretta, and hands it to her. "Come on, kiddo, let's see you shoot."

"Regular bullets?" Jo cocks a brow and examines the gun, checking everything over.

Nora gives her a look. "The fancy ones are expensive."

"Don't you mean hard to steal?" Jo asks with a quick grin.

"Hey, I buy my ammo fair." Nora looks affronted. "Old friend of mine sort of…fell into a certain business. I get a great deal on the price."

Jo rolls her eyes. "You've got lousy taste in men."

Nora laughs and shakes her head. "Who says it's a man? Kids these days, I thought you were all supposed to be in the know about these things? I'm absolutely _crushed_." She manhandles Jo over into place. "Now, before you go and tell me there's no Santa Claus, let's see if you live up to your mother's billing."

Jo rolls her eyes and lets Nora adjust her posture. "Are you sure you're talking about the right Ellen? Mom does not brag about me."

"I'm sensing a little skepticism," Nora murmurs from behind her, nudging her arms up.

"Call it realism," Jo shifts her hips and squints at the first bottle. "It's not like she's got a whole hell of a lot to brag _about_. All I ever hear –"

"Is how big you screwed up when you left college, or how bigger you screwed up when you decided on hunting and where the fuck are my grandkids already?" She feels Nora shrug behind her, body brushing hers with the motion. She shakes her head a little and sights again. "She's a Mom. It's a thing. You hunting scares the hell out of her."

Jo rolls her eyes at that. "I know she's scared, hell, _Ash_ knows that much. Mom's convinced I'm going to get myself killed."

"You will," Nora agrees matter-of-factly, putting her hands on Jo's hips and turning her a little. Jo swallows. "We all will. You hunt? You die and you die messy. It's not like we've got a whole lot of call for a pension plan." Her hands squeeze Jo's hips and Jo flinches. "Shoot."

Jo fires.

She misses.

"The trick's getting your body to make the shot when your brain can't," Nora says calmly as Jo turns away with a scowl. "We'll work on that."

*

"Your Mom was a hunter _before_ your Dad?" The question slips out of her watching Nora painstakingly clean her guns then load the clips with the special rounds. She's not sure if it's touchy ground or not but her curiosity gets the better of her and she asks anyway.

Nora just nods. "She grew up with it. My grandmother was into the Craft; my grandfather was a hunter who came looking for her help." She smiles faintly but doesn't look up from her work. "Mom grew up with it and passed it onto me. Dad swears he met her when she saved him from a succubus."

"You don't believe him?"

"Dad's a romantic." Nora says. "I'm not."

"Yes," Jo decides, seeing Nora's hand shake. "You are. You just don't want to be." She ought to know, she doesn't either.

*

"Find anything?"

Jo jumps. "Are you crazy?" She demands, spinning to find Nora standing behind her with two coffees in hand.

"I've been accused of it," Nora shrugs. "You find anything?" She pushes a cup toward Jo and nods at the map.

"Yeah," Jo stabs at the paper with a finger, pointing at the hotel. "We are here. That help?"

"Tons," Nora assures dryly. "There's some abandoned buildings downtown, condemned. The kind even the rats won't hang out in. Perfect for bloodsuckers with tax avoidance issues." She swallows a mouthful of coffee, licking her lips. "I figure we try there."

Jo rolls her eyes. "Then why have I spent the whole fucking morning scouring a _map_?"

That gets her another wicked grin. "You're cute when you're distracted. Also, I needed to make an ammo run and no _way_ I was taking you with me for that. Amanda's the jealous type."

"Are you kidding me?" Jo gapes.

Nora shrugs again. "Of course," she grabs her bag off the bed. "C'mon shortstack, grab your stuff. We're burning daylight."

Jo blinks.

Oh yeah, Nora and Dean? _Perfect_ for each other. She can't think of a couple who deserve each other more.

*

"Why is it never a Hilton?" Nora sighs, watching two vampires squint against the morning sun as they duck into the abandoned brewery.

"Because even vampires have standards?" Jo smarts back. "Who knows what they'd catch."

Nora looks over and grins. "Right. What was I thinking?" She sits back in the seat. "Eat your burger, we've got to wait for them to brush behind their fangs and ask for just one more chapter of Count Dracula before bed."

"Are you sure my mother didn't send you?" Jo looks at the cheeseburger and fries in her lap.

"_Very_ sure," Nora affirms. "Eat. I die because your stomach growls at a very inopportune moment? Not enough rock salt in the world to keep me from haunting your scrawny ass."

"My ass is not..." Jo stops. "I was not just..."

Nora snickers gleefully. "What? Argue that your ass is not scrawny? Oh yeah, you were." She grins and pats Jo on the knee. "Relax, shortstack, your ass is not really scrawny but it could use some work. You really want to hunt? Hit the gym now and then or the next vampire you meet? Will use you as a toothpick."

Jo opens her mouth to argue before thinking better of it. Nora's watching her with a hint of amusement in her eyes and she is _not_ going to play to it. She bites into the cheeseburger and beams a fake grin. "Mmm...Yummy."

"Exactly what I was thinking," Nora agrees and blows a bubble.

*

"Explosives?" Jo says, incredulous. "Are you serious?"

Nora straightens up and nods. "Duh, you think I'm going in there to pop them off one by one? You know what they call hunters who do that?"

Jo folds her arms and rolls her eyes, "Dinner."

"Exactly," Nora closes the trunk. "So, we make it look like a gas explosion. Building goes boom, vampires go up in a lovely little inferno, and we pop off whichever ones make it outside. Word of advice for you kiddo, if you can do it cheap and easy then don't waste your time worrying about style."

"Because people who worry about style, end up dinner." Jo nods. "Yeah, got it."

"No," Nora shakes her head. "Dessert."

"You? Are a pain in the ass." Jo grabs a gun. "You know that, right?"

Nora winks. "Years of practice, cupcake. Years and years of practice."

*

Blowing up a building? Well, it's not nearly as spectacular as Fox News would lead you to believe.

Jo watches from a safe distance as Nora ducks out of the alley, fresh from setting the last charge, and slips out of sight behind a dumpster. She counts down with the timer then hears the muffled bangs of the bombs exploding, sees the glass shatter and fall to the ground.

"Showtime," she whispers, taking the safety off the gun and picking up the machete.

She's the better shot but Nora's faster off the draw and the first vampire to run out falls from her bullet. They let him lie where he falls, the fire consuming him. Jo's breath comes quicker, adrenaline fueling the speed, and her eyes dart back and forth with the effort to try and watch all the windows at once. It's hard to think straight when it gets to this point and she swallows hard, closing her eyes for a moment.

And feels a hand land on her shoulder.

"Hello pretty," a voice purrs into her ear as she's yanked upright. "And here I thought we just had rats...this is much better."

Another hand yanks the gun out of her hand and Jo's swung around to face a petite blonde. Not exactly what she was expecting, vampire mastermind and all. "Wow," she says with a nervous giggle, "I thought you'd be taller...and male."

The vampire smirks. "Sorry to disappoint." She pauses then laughs. "Wait, no I'm not." Pressing closer, she closes her eyes and inhales. "Mmmm...I do love delivery or," she smirks, "are you DiGiorno?"

It's a rule, Jo's sure, that every single bad guy - girl, whatever - on the planet has a playbook somewhere. "Cheesy jokes for dummies". "Look," she frowns, wondering when Nora's going to hurry the hell up, "just kill me or use me as a hostage, whatever, okay? This gets old after the first few menacings."

"Ohhh, aren't you all nice and spirited," the vampire sighs, sliding a hand along her stomach. Jo bites back on the urge to retch. "I love them when they've got a little fire in their belly."

"Must've been why we were so fucking hot," Nora agrees from behind her.

"Okay, _what_?!" Jo leans around the vampire to gape at her partner. "Are you fucking serious?"

"Oh she's fucking something," the vampire laughs.

"Not you, not anymore," Nora lifts the gun and smirks. "Honey, I'm home." She singsongs before adding,"I'd say you look good, Jules, but...well, yeah, have you been getting enough sun? You're a little pale."

"Will you just shoot her!" Jo exclaims. "God!"

"Oh she won't shoot me, sweetheart," Jules assures confidently. "Nora and I? We have history."

"Yeah," Nora nods. "You cheated on me with your ex and got turned into a vampire." She tilts her head. "You know, I never believed in karma really...that? That completely turned me around." She pulls the trigger. "And, believe me, our history? There was no way I _wasn't_ going to shoot you."

"Took you long enough!" Jo ignores the fact she's shaking as she shoves Jules off her. "What the hell where you waiting for? A sign from God?"

Nora grins, grabbing her by the hand and hauling her forward. "In this business? You never know."

*

"An arms dealer, a Winchester, and a vampire?!" Sliding into the passenger seat, Jo rounds on Nora. "Are you _serious_?"

Starting the car, Nora wrinkles her nose. "Yeah, I know, sounds like the beginning of a really bad joke doesn't it?" She shrugs dismissively. "I've got a really weird backstory, Jo. Occupational hazard. My list of exes has more nuts than Planters."

"Please tell me that Jules is at the top of the list?" Jo almost pleads. "If I'm sticking around, I need to know."

Nora frowns. "Who said you were?"

"I just did," she grins smugly. "You used me as bait; you owe me."

"I do not!" Nora argues. "At no point did I agree to any such deal."

"Aha! But you're not arguing the bait line either," Jo points out. "I'm staying, Nora. So, Jules? Weirdest of the weird right?" Nora hesitates and Jo stares. "_Right_?!"

Fire trucks scream past them as they slow to stop at a red light and Nora licks her lips. "Well..."

"_Nora!_"

Nora hits the gas. "I'll tell you later."

Jo just grins.


End file.
